If you know me and if I told you that I am an introvert, you will never believe me. And it’s okay. Because an extroverted introvert like me is always confusing to understand.
That’s how so many other people are too. But we are often misunderstood and so we get these “Hey! Are you okay?” a lot of times. That’s why I want to break some myths today about introverts like: Introverts don’t like people, introverts don’t like talking, introverts are aloof nerds etc.
Being extremely social online, people only see my outgoing side even though I spend way more time introverting than following the crowd. And my outgoing side gets the most attention because that is what goes online to my Facebook and Snapchats – my pictures, my check-ins, my selfies etc.
Let me tell you a story that happened a few weekends ago.
I spent my Saturday alone, washing clothes, writing, cleaning my room and getting errands done. My friend texted me up at 7:30 pm and asked about what my plans were and if I was up for meeting him. As much as I wanted to go out and do something fun, I was struggling to respond to him for almost half an hour and just replied saying-“Hey! Umm..I am not sure!”. I just couldn’t choose in between going out for drinks and sitting at home doing nothing alone. It took me about an hour and a significant amount of energy to decide and call him up to figure out the plan for the night.
I finally stepped out for some great dinner and a party. And you know what I did. I attended a great party, had some yummy food and I danced like a crazy woman. I met a whole bunch of new people and I had tons of fun. But the very next day, I did some grocery shopping, went to the gym, cooked alone and ate alone. I couldn’t tell if I enjoyed the party more or the next day when I was all my myself. So, yes. I am outgoing but not all the time. I know it’s confusing. Sometimes, I just love to get out there, meeting new people but also most times I am always rushing to get home and recharge in my solitude..
- We suck at responding to texts because sometimes we don’t want to talk- to anyone. We expect you to understand that it doesn’t mean we do not like you or we are trying to avoid you.
- We are happiest in crowded places like cafes, coffee shops surrounded by people, but still with selective company. It’s weird you know. We love the crowd around us but not with us.
- We are extremely active on social media but in reality we are way more private than you can imagine.
- We don’t really have a staple group of friends We often have one or two individuals in our lifetime who are our closest friends. And we make these best friends our life and we would do anything for them. They are there when we need them and we don’t necessarily talk or meet everyday.And it’s not true that we don’t like making new friends. In fact, we find it easy to make new friends. Maintaining those friendships is another story. We like to save our love and loyalty only for a few select people in our lives.
- If we like you, we really like you. If we hang out with you, take it as a compliment. Seriously, it’s a big deal for us to just meet anyone to hang out with. We don’t like to spend our energy and time with people we don’t connect with. We hate obligations even in family relationships.
- We are misunderstood as being flirtatious. We are not. We hate small talk. We are looking for true connection all the time. We are making an effort intentionally to have a real conversation. We like people to know that they have our undivided attention and interest.
- We are always wrapped in your own head. We are our own best friend. We are always thinking, talking to ourselves even when we are alone or with people around. Our mind goes in different directions. We sometimes force ourself into crying because we want to be sad. Also, we give ourself a pep talk when we need to feel good. Basically we are crazy yet we are our own best friend.