It’s February 2017. We see most women around us are in control of their personal lives than before. We have many women role models making us proud in almost every industry in the world. We have all grown up as equals in schools, college and in workplace too. As a woman, if anybody treats us anything but EQUAL, we speak up and complain. But when it comes to the dating sphere, there is this one aspect that is conspicuously unchanged in women. There is this stereotype that women must never ask a guy out. They must only give signals if they are interested in a guy and that the guy must formally ask the girl.
I think these expectations in the world of dating is quite old school and unnecessary. This is really bad role modeling for young women.
Girls, you would notice that women are no longer sitting in the fairyland bubble waiting for Mr. Prince anymore. We are so much beyond this. Inspite of all the feminism that we promote and talk about, most of us still expect men to take the lead and initiate relationships.
Why is the girl always told that if a man is interested in you, he must approach you? If you are genuinely interested in someone no matter what gender you are, it’s perfectly acceptable for you to make the first move. In certain occasions in my life, I have been a pursuer and it has worked better for me than waiting to be “chosen”. I have gotten backlash for doing this mostly by my girl-friends and I couldn’t tell why back then.
The fear of rejection is hard for sure but if men can take this risk, then why is it riskier for women?
There is ofcourse a stigma attached to the concept of a woman making the first move in initiating a relationship. I understand why most women are reluctant to do this.
Women constantly fear that they are probably sending the wrong cultural messages while taking the first romantic step and might be tagged Bold and in a more non-Sanskaari context. Asking a guy out, doesn’t make you less of an ideal woman. I know, TV and films portray such women as fast and desperate. The scripts in these films show women in bad light for being the first movers at dating; they are telling us that a woman is supposed to be humiliated if she is trying to be a man that way.
You know that you are not desperate to ask him out. You know who you like and that’s cool. Like other aspects in your life, you have clear goals and ambitions in your personal life too. You are just trying to make it work. Don’t let media or cultural cliches hold you back.
And, hello! men have the right to saying NO too. Do not ever forget that.
Take the plunge because you have nothing to loose from at least trying. Nobody should shame you for making a move. If you start your dating phase with a sexist baggage, then you are setting yourself into something very complicated.
So, this Valentines’ day be a WOMAN and ask him out OKAY! Happy Valentines’Day!
OUTFIT DETAILS: Dress: Only India Bag: Thrifted Sandals: Tresmode